Here we are again

Time to get started. In a very sunny Haggerston Park. 

The soundtrack of the moment is the Velvet Underground. The baby is sleeping in her buggy.

A lot has happened since my last post: birth, relationship breakdown, relocation, move to London, and First Birthday. 

Still working on the Partner Look, or at least a consistent colour palette. Constance's wardrobe is far larger than mine and I often find her look outshines my own but I guess that's part of raising a girl; accepting that she is destined to be greater than I. At least that's what I'm aiming for and until she can actually walk and talk, it seems as if her style is a good place to start. Her brain is a work in progress so more on that later. 

Today is a grey marl day.

Topshop digs the Partner Look

Today on the Partner Look we have some Topshop. We all love Topshop. I find it quite expensive and the sizing a bit off and sometimes a bit too hip for me now that I am an old woman but, generally speaking at least, we all LOVE Topshop. Anyway, they have started a childrens' range (Topshop Mini) which, whilst not very broad, does have some really nice stuff. Our beautiful Sophie found this lovely Partner Look this week, featuring a maternity jumper and a matching baby jumper. Why you would want to pre-empt the Partner Look during pregnancy and whilst your Partner can't really join in is a bit of a mystery but there you go. I think this jumper would work post-partum as an over-sized thing with some black skinny jeans or something but, living in the south of France, over-sized jumpers become surplus to requirement for much of the year. Especially now. It is getting hot. Poor me and my massive belly. See the photo below, modelled by the lovely Sophie (also sporting a Partner of her own but he/she is still in the early cooking stages).

Sophie, our regal assistant for the day  

The lovely Christine also sent us a link to a shop based in Maui that digs the Partner Look, Cinnamon Girl (http://www.cinnamongirl.com/). Here we can see just one example of what they have on offer:

Apologies for the quality of the photo. I am an inter-moron and don't know how to make it better. I would like to blame my Partner but that seems a little unfair. Even before getting knocked up I doubt if I would have been able to do it. Anyway, here I can only imagine the mother is whispering to her daughter 'I HATE you for making me wear this, you twat'. The verdict is the children look ok, the mothers do not. No one wants this to be a consequence of the Partner Look. My look is paramount, my Partner is pretty much going to have to lump it. Partners are, generally speaking, inherently cute until they hit puberty anyway so they'll have to take what they are given.

Talking of me and my Partner here is my 8 month bump:

8 months oh shit who me neverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

As you can doubtless see, my Partner is becoming ever-keener to make her presence known. This is clear by my massive gut, how long it takes me to get up out of bed/any chair, the fact I can't see my chatte any more (probably for the best, God only knows what is going on down there) and, finally, the fact I can't put tights on. Good thing I am not some weirdo who wears lace-up shoes because I would be in trouble. Things are going well here, still waiting for news on the flat, mechanic is due to pick the car up for repair today and then we are going for an exciting trip to the Post Office and maybe to see the family-in-law in the Var. Should be a nice weekend. Still having issues with very achy coccyx and some cramps which is annoying but things could be worse. I think I found my first stretch marks yesterday although they could have been duvet marks, who knows. Regardless, it reminded me about this amazing swimsuit:

Ariel is going to get it

I love this swimming costume. You can find it here: http://blackmilkclothing.com/products/shark-v-s-mermaids-swimsuit .

Here is a close-up:

Ariel is in serious trouble

I never liked my stomach even before getting pregnant so, although the discovery of stretch marks made me feel like I wanted to cry, I am trying to see the positive side of all of the different bathing costumes I can buy. ASOS have loads of nice ones. The Jaws one is obviously my favourite but it is in Australia and expensive and I would like to try it on first and I don't know what size I will be after birth etc so I won't buy it for now but I shall remember it for later.

I have to go and eat a pastry before I die.

Bon weekend a tous,

N x

The Partner Look continues across the globe (sort of)

Today we have our first entry from friends Amy and Gabriel sporting a fabulous Partner Look. You can't go wrong with stripes and, considering Gabriel's parentage, this seems just right. If you look closely you can see that Amy has even succeeded in matching the width of the stripes exactly and aligning them just for our photo: she truly is the perfect woman. Amy: thank you. A great Partner Look and you are now both fully-fledged members our our club. Don't hesitate to send in your own contributions if you want to join in.

The fabulous and lovely Amy and Gabriel at your service

The Sunday Times Style Guide has also been of assistance today with their Twitter mention of these childrens' loafers:

Courtesy of Sunday Times Style

Any of the women featured below could work this look with their offspring, as could Kanye or that old Playboy man or other rich twats or twats who wish to appear rich on their yachts or bikes or whatever.

Courtesy of whowhatwear.com

A special mention is reserved for men who wear the loafers without socks: I hate you.

I found another excellent website with a broad range of Partner Looks. See the best photo below.

I actually quite like this dress although sadly I think I will have to wait a few years until this version of the Partner Look could come into fruition. I have my suspicions as to whether this size 6 21 year old is the REAL mother of this 4/5 year old child but let's not get bogged down in the detail.

I found another website subscribing to the Partner Look: the odiously-titled Me n' Mommy. See here:
http://www.menmommy.com/

   As irritating as the name is I actually quite liked this look (leopard print leggings below). Definitely one I could go for. In reality, I would imagine my Partner Look will be based on matching basics rather than actually matching entire outfits or looks so this is some good inspiration for me.

Seems I am not the only one who digs the Partner Look. I found this Pinterest account online last night:
http://pinterest.com/jjackieooten/matching-family-outfits/

I don't understand Pinterest but I liked looking at the pictures.

Not much else to report really. Still waiting for news/development on moving house. I went window shopping for a baby sleeping bag that will be suitable for the hot summer here. Another Frenchy told me I spoke with an Italian accent, mamma mia. My parents are coming to visit next week and I am very excited, trying to get stupid car fixed before their arrival. My Frenchy is teaching at the flat today so I am currently sitting in a cafe having a decaff in a cloud of cigarette smoke and waiting for him to finish.

Bisous à tous,

N x

OH, HELLO. THE PARTNER LOOK IS BACK

Men and boys are in no way excluded from the Partner Look

So, having had one of the most challenging periods of my life, interspersed with really good bits, I am determined to get back into writing my blog, or writing anything at all for that matter.
The discovery of this little beauty of a Partner Look may also have been involved in the resurrection process.

See here the Partner Look in action in Aix en Provence. This is a shop which exclusively stocks mens' matching swimwear in adult and child sizes. It is a very expensive shop. The swimwear is horrible. The Partner Look aspect is the only redeeming feature.



The Partner Look: An update.

The last two months have been ridiculous and busy and full of ups and downs but things are generally good now, the sun is out, my bebe is healthy and I am nearing the end which means gin and tonic and no elasticated waists (eventually). I am 8 months pregnant, feeling enormous but still managing to wear a lot on my normal clothes which is great because I don't feel too removed from ME ME ME.
Here is a picture of me and my child to be:

Oh no massive and this was a few weeks ago

In terms of further updates here is the most recent picture of my Partner. She looks like a baby. Apparently she looks like me but I can't be sure. Pregnancy is hard at times and great at other times but one thing is for sure: I cannot WAIT to see her face and know what she looks like. I had never imagined the suspense would be so great but it really is. Look at her:

My bebe's tiny face.

Already not wanting to let her mother hog the limelight, my Partner has appeared in a little video. I suppose it would be considered a silent movie, at least until I start shouting. My stomach now resembles an egg with a massive trapped creature inside it. Essentially that is what it is. Here she is:

My search for the Partner Look is ongoing. I have found lots of stripy tops and things for my Partner but have lots of clothes already and need to sort them all out so am reticent to buy anything else at the moment, especially as we are due to move house and need to save our $. Submissions of your own Partner Looks most welcome. LET ME SEE YOU AND YOUR EGO REFLECTED IN YOUR CHILD'S WARDROBE. Famous nutters sporting the look also much desired.

Bisous,

N x

Update: I found another shop that stocks parent and child matching swimwear with really nice matching bikinis. Couldn't get a photo but rest assured they were suitably stylish and stripy and French looking. WANT.

The Pink Panther Look...wait, I've got that wrong

Another day, another Partner Look, this time from massive-gobbed bus driver Pink. As you can see, my least-favourite-singer-whatever-she-is-make-her-shut-the-hell-up likes to attempt to match her bottom half with her baby daddy and her top half with her partner. Interesting idea but they all look like shit. Hang on, the baby looks fine. Remind me never to look at a picture of Pink again.

The Triumvirate Partner Look Powerhouse Puke Party

I had an ok day today, generally speaking. Got up with the Frog before work then made some phone calls. I found a clinic nearby with birthing pools and they spaces and it is free and they have gynaecologists I can see in Aix so if I'm having the baby here, I'm having it there. It seems as if water births are not as commonplace as in the UK but it has always appealed to me, particularly because I LOVE the idea of fishing for bits of my poo with a sieve. SOUNDS COOL.

I also saw a GP today, the Frog's to be precise, as the laboratory called and said I had a wee infection, anaemia and a million other things wrong, fabulous. Anyway, the doctor made two utterly inappropriate jokes: when we entered the room he turned to Frog and said 'Your girlfriend? Couldn't you get a French one?' and a couple of minutes later he laughed and asked 'So the kids yours then, is it?' WHAT A DICKSTAIN. I want to tell the GMC but they would say 'COME BACK TO ENGLAND AND THE ADORABLE NHS, YOU TWAT.' Needless to say I won't be visiting that GP again on account of the fact he is a misogynist idiot AND was wearing tight jeans, orangey shoes and was too groomed by half. OBVIOUSLY THEY DON'T DISH OUT COURTESY AND DIGNITY WITH THE HIPPOCRATIC OATH HERE. What an utter prick. 

I also went to work and drew 26 different cars, that was enjoyable. I have a new translation project to start tomorrow, as well as first trip to French hairdresser. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

Some French twat

Victoria Beckham knows about the Partner Look

Another follower of the Partner Look ethos: the fabulous Victoria Beckham and her daughter Harper. I can only imagine how happy she was to have finally had a girl, thus providing her with the opportunity to create a child in her own image. Here we have an image of Harper in skinny jeans with VB in her own matching pair. This is certainly a doable Partner Look and one I shall doubtless fall back on.                                                                     

                                       

Of course Victoria understands the power of the Partner Look

My friend Luciana sent me an amazing link which shall certainly help to facilitate the Partner Look: the Cos childrens wear shop. See here:

http://www.cosstores.com/Shop/Children

They have loads of breton tops, skinny jeans and black dresses, it is like my very own personal Partner Look shop. Well spotted, Luci. The fact that most of the items cost more than I would spend on myself may represent a bit of a stumbling block but I did pass a test for a new job today so things are looking up.

Not much else going on today. Went to work, talked to some friends, called my dad to say Happy Birthday, the usual. I am trying to prepare questions to see my gynaecologist next week, things about possibility of water birth etc. Was considering this other clinic, l'Etoile, which we may have been able to access due to our health insurance but a girl at my baby group mentioned it was run by nuns and rather conservative. Even if they offer more right-on birthing solutions, I think I would prefer to avoid something with religious undertones. Had enough of that for a lifetime. Anyway, I'll see how I get on with the doctor next week and go from there I suppose. I also got a semi job offer from a British translation agency which is great because it could be the solution to my problems in terms of my maternity entitlement. CROSS EVERYTHING, PEOPLE. Had no coffee and baby seems a bit less nutso, we'll see how that goes. I am currently being chatted up by some odd old Frenchman so should sign off. He was yet another person who, on hearing my French, asked if I was Italian. It is amazing how much of an effect my Italian has on my French, who knew this could happen?

This was the Partner Look, over and out.

   

Alien Re-resurrection: The Babybelle Cometh

 

Nothing like a wriggling monster to put you off your lunch. My partner was getting jealous of all of the attention I was receiving so she begged me (kicked me) until I agreed to let her be the star of her own film.

Sex en Provence Cinema proudly presents Alien Re-resurrection: The Babybelle Cometh





In other news I am feeling much better today. Got up early to see Frog off to work, stayed in bed a bit longer but got up eventually and went to Mother and Baby group. Met some other pregnoids and new mothers which was nice, comparing experiences at hospital and such like. They seem really nice so I'm glad to be creating a bit of a network here. One was 16 weeks and looked far more pregnant than me, I feel a combination of relief and envy. After that I found the laboratory to do my blood and wee tests and got that sorted, I can get my results on Thursday. Only difference really is that they check for toxoplasmosis here, in the UK they don't give a shit about it. I tried to tell the woman I grew up in a house with lots of cats so was probably immune but she proceeded to tell me that being a cat-owner was no risk to the baby. Fine, I thought, me and my imaginary cat give up.


I came home for lunch before work and DHL called saying they had a package for me. Eeeeek. It arrived and it was the Peter Rabbit Baby Gap range that my parents had send over as a gift. FANKS, 'RENTS. I still want the ballet tights and Jemima Puddleduck hat, may have to get them myself but it seems a bit unnecessary. Anyway, as you can see from the picture below, in order to effectively act out the Partner Look, I am going to have to start to seriously consider incorporating some more pink into my wardrobe. So far I have just one bright pink houndstooth pencil skirt, that won't do at all. If anyone can let me know where I can buy any 10-12 pink dresses with ducks on I would be really grateful, as well as looking like a real dickhead.

Baby Gap Peter Rabbit range