The Pink Panther Look...wait, I've got that wrong

Another day, another Partner Look, this time from massive-gobbed bus driver Pink. As you can see, my least-favourite-singer-whatever-she-is-make-her-shut-the-hell-up likes to attempt to match her bottom half with her baby daddy and her top half with her partner. Interesting idea but they all look like shit. Hang on, the baby looks fine. Remind me never to look at a picture of Pink again.

The Triumvirate Partner Look Powerhouse Puke Party

I had an ok day today, generally speaking. Got up with the Frog before work then made some phone calls. I found a clinic nearby with birthing pools and they spaces and it is free and they have gynaecologists I can see in Aix so if I'm having the baby here, I'm having it there. It seems as if water births are not as commonplace as in the UK but it has always appealed to me, particularly because I LOVE the idea of fishing for bits of my poo with a sieve. SOUNDS COOL.

I also saw a GP today, the Frog's to be precise, as the laboratory called and said I had a wee infection, anaemia and a million other things wrong, fabulous. Anyway, the doctor made two utterly inappropriate jokes: when we entered the room he turned to Frog and said 'Your girlfriend? Couldn't you get a French one?' and a couple of minutes later he laughed and asked 'So the kids yours then, is it?' WHAT A DICKSTAIN. I want to tell the GMC but they would say 'COME BACK TO ENGLAND AND THE ADORABLE NHS, YOU TWAT.' Needless to say I won't be visiting that GP again on account of the fact he is a misogynist idiot AND was wearing tight jeans, orangey shoes and was too groomed by half. OBVIOUSLY THEY DON'T DISH OUT COURTESY AND DIGNITY WITH THE HIPPOCRATIC OATH HERE. What an utter prick. 

I also went to work and drew 26 different cars, that was enjoyable. I have a new translation project to start tomorrow, as well as first trip to French hairdresser. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

Some French twat

Victoria Beckham knows about the Partner Look

Another follower of the Partner Look ethos: the fabulous Victoria Beckham and her daughter Harper. I can only imagine how happy she was to have finally had a girl, thus providing her with the opportunity to create a child in her own image. Here we have an image of Harper in skinny jeans with VB in her own matching pair. This is certainly a doable Partner Look and one I shall doubtless fall back on.                                                                     

                                       

Of course Victoria understands the power of the Partner Look

My friend Luciana sent me an amazing link which shall certainly help to facilitate the Partner Look: the Cos childrens wear shop. See here:

http://www.cosstores.com/Shop/Children

They have loads of breton tops, skinny jeans and black dresses, it is like my very own personal Partner Look shop. Well spotted, Luci. The fact that most of the items cost more than I would spend on myself may represent a bit of a stumbling block but I did pass a test for a new job today so things are looking up.

Not much else going on today. Went to work, talked to some friends, called my dad to say Happy Birthday, the usual. I am trying to prepare questions to see my gynaecologist next week, things about possibility of water birth etc. Was considering this other clinic, l'Etoile, which we may have been able to access due to our health insurance but a girl at my baby group mentioned it was run by nuns and rather conservative. Even if they offer more right-on birthing solutions, I think I would prefer to avoid something with religious undertones. Had enough of that for a lifetime. Anyway, I'll see how I get on with the doctor next week and go from there I suppose. I also got a semi job offer from a British translation agency which is great because it could be the solution to my problems in terms of my maternity entitlement. CROSS EVERYTHING, PEOPLE. Had no coffee and baby seems a bit less nutso, we'll see how that goes. I am currently being chatted up by some odd old Frenchman so should sign off. He was yet another person who, on hearing my French, asked if I was Italian. It is amazing how much of an effect my Italian has on my French, who knew this could happen?

This was the Partner Look, over and out.

   

Alien Re-resurrection: The Babybelle Cometh

 

Nothing like a wriggling monster to put you off your lunch. My partner was getting jealous of all of the attention I was receiving so she begged me (kicked me) until I agreed to let her be the star of her own film.

Sex en Provence Cinema proudly presents Alien Re-resurrection: The Babybelle Cometh





In other news I am feeling much better today. Got up early to see Frog off to work, stayed in bed a bit longer but got up eventually and went to Mother and Baby group. Met some other pregnoids and new mothers which was nice, comparing experiences at hospital and such like. They seem really nice so I'm glad to be creating a bit of a network here. One was 16 weeks and looked far more pregnant than me, I feel a combination of relief and envy. After that I found the laboratory to do my blood and wee tests and got that sorted, I can get my results on Thursday. Only difference really is that they check for toxoplasmosis here, in the UK they don't give a shit about it. I tried to tell the woman I grew up in a house with lots of cats so was probably immune but she proceeded to tell me that being a cat-owner was no risk to the baby. Fine, I thought, me and my imaginary cat give up.


I came home for lunch before work and DHL called saying they had a package for me. Eeeeek. It arrived and it was the Peter Rabbit Baby Gap range that my parents had send over as a gift. FANKS, 'RENTS. I still want the ballet tights and Jemima Puddleduck hat, may have to get them myself but it seems a bit unnecessary. Anyway, as you can see from the picture below, in order to effectively act out the Partner Look, I am going to have to start to seriously consider incorporating some more pink into my wardrobe. So far I have just one bright pink houndstooth pencil skirt, that won't do at all. If anyone can let me know where I can buy any 10-12 pink dresses with ducks on I would be really grateful, as well as looking like a real dickhead.

Baby Gap Peter Rabbit range

Bebe blues: only the Partner Look if she also has a face like a smacked arse

I have been in a very funny mood for the last few days, really exhausted and feeling down. I suppose this is the reality of pregnancy. It is hard. It comes in waves and sometimes you feel great and others you feel like you want to cry and could sleep forever and as if everything is totally shit. Anyway, I wasn't going to write anything but I thought that it was better to be honest; this is a part of pregnancy, the stress and fatigue and hormones and everything, so here it is.

I am trying to totally cut out caffeine, it is difficult. I am worried I am going to get mad headaches if I go cold turkey. None of my trousers fit so I sit around with them undone, something I enjoyed doing before but at least now I have a legitimate excuse to do so. I am still fine with my dresses for now but must go maternity jeans shopping. I have to go to the laboratory to get my blood tests done ready for my appointment with my gynecologist next week so am going first thing in the morning as it is fasting test. Hope all is well. I think tiredness is as a result of sleeping badly rather than anything more sinister.

I did get offered some proper Italian teaching here today so that is something positive, starts next week. It was also really sunny here today, absolutely beautiful, so I mustn't complain as I look at photos of the UK covered in snow. Had positive counselling session which made a change to her sitting there, saying nothing and yawning. I MUST REMEMBER TO COUNT BLESSINGS AND NOT BE A SAD SACK. I have a healthy baby who is ridiculously active and I am so looking forward to meeting her. I will try and get some more Partner Look inspiration over the next few days. Here is a little picture to get us started again for tomorrow:

Asians working the Partner Look. Why of course

22 week bebe face

Ok, my experience with the French medical system went slightly better today. I arrived at the hospital to  find a nurse who laughed, exclaiming 'There is no doctor, it's a Saturday!' 'I know', I told her, 'they told me to come back today'. She carried on explaining that there were no doctors until I interrupted, tears in my eyes, and shouted that someone had to see me. Pregnancy is hard sometimes. I am a cry-baby idiot.  Anyway, she rushed off and found the doctor and 40 minutes later we had a scan. Hooray. I was able to ask a lot about the French birthing system, they have no gas and air/high epidural and c-section rate etc., but she was really nice and put my mind at rest. Feeling guilty, she let me go for a wee a couple of times to attempt to move my partner so we could get a nice shot and, lo and behold, here is her face. She is giving you a little wave. Fabulous.

Say 'ello to my liddle friendddd

The Turbinators

My sister is on-board with the Partner Look. She has suggested knitting a turban for my partner, just like mummy. Here is the idea:

The turbinator  junior

The turbinator senior

I think this is a look we can both pull off. My partner and I will be very happy together. As such, Auntie Charlotte may we request a black turban for my baby but not newborn size as we will be in France and her head will be hot. Maybe 3-6 months? Thanks so much.

N.B. Don't be alarmed about the nose, she may well grow into hers

French system: Strike one

So today I was due to have my first scan in France, the second trimester ultrasound. Got there, waited forty minutes, a nurse told us the sonographer had gone home. I want to be able to put my trust in a system that is so unknown to me but this does not bode well. Anyway it has driven me to drink. I arrived home with 5 kg of mussels, 2 kg of chips and a bottle of wine (moules marinieres, mais oui). In a mood, obviously, I cooked chips and had a tiny glass of wine. FRANCE: THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.
Therefore, instead of a picture of my baby, here is a picture of me getting SHITFACED (sort of, not at all). I hope this will be rectified tomorrow morning because they invited us back for a repeat appt. at 10am. LET'S SEE

Tardy French doctors drive pregnant woman to drink scandal

22 weeks from the big bang

So, I was going to post my new maternity wardrobe today but none of it fits. Dommage. Here is a tip: don't bother doing maternity shopping online. It is a fool's errand. It is difficult because in France clothes tend to be more expensive and not to my tastes so I would rather buy in the UK and get it shipped. Asos has a great range of maternity wear but the sizing seems off, all a bit too big. What to do, what to do...

In other news, today my friend Luciana told me that Topshop have started to do baby clothes. Here is the link: http://tinyurl.com/b9cczoh This could certainly help to facilitate the Partner Look. I haven't had a comprehensive response from my partner in terms of her attitude towards Topshop as yet but she seems indifferent so she is probably going to be stuck with it. 

Also made some purchases from Baby Gap because they have a Beatrix Potter range and I LOVED Jemima Puddleduck as a child so I am very excited I can force this on my partner. Here is the link http://www.gap.com/products/peter-rabbit-baby-girl-clothing.jsp

One thing I am worried about in terms of the Partner Look ethos is which we way go; do I change my wardrobe to meet her requirements or do I force her into mine while she still can't resist? I don't want to look like a dickhead in a pink hat but I don't want to be criticised for dressing my partner in black. I am hoping we can find some middle ground, perhaps counselling will help.

Anyway, up until now my partner has been a little shy but, as you can see from the picture, today she wanted to say HELLO.

22 weeks and counting

Partner footwear

My partner's first shoes, a little gift from son pere on his trip to South Africa. I am currently on the lookout for a dress for my partner which would be a good match for these babies. Something with a brown base, possible animal theme but wouldn't want to go overboard on the jungle look. Not yet anyway. Perhaps I can wear my leopard print maternity jeans or dress when my partner tries out this look. That could work. Otherwise, does anyone know where I can get these in a 39/6? Much appreciated.

I am partner, hear me roar

The Partner Look update: I have found the shoes. Thanks to Auntie Jo. I am going to try to work these with black skinnies and oversized black vest, South of France summer style.

Shoes for partner senior. Roar.

The Partner Look: Phase One (22 weeks)

So, the Partner Look has begun. 

I have developed a downy fluff on my belly. This can only be in sympathy with my partner and her lanugo fluff. We are one.

Me and my partner have something in common already

Moreover, I can teach my baby about denim hot pants and black ballerina flats. She will thank me in the long run. 

Even the Mail knows

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2289298/Is-mini-fashion-creepiest-trend-Matching-mother-daughter-outfits-new-High-Street-fad.html

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. I'm not the only one who recognises the beauty of the Partner Look. Their looks are so blanket bad, Lord knows why you would want to recreate them (see personal favourite above). Oh well. Happy to meet others who subscribe to the Partner Look ethos

First post

So, here we are. 
This will be the Partner Look. 

As my partner is currently indisposed (growing and shit), I shall have to speak on her behalf for now.

If you look down you can see my partner when she was very small. So small she had no arms and legs.

My partner, 9 weeks old

Look down again and you can see my slightly increased partner. She was about 12 weeks old here so not quite big enough for a Louboutin pump but could maybe work a kitten heel.  At least she had legs.

My partner, 12 weeks old. She grew limbs

Underneath we have a picture of my partner at 20 weeks. Well, we would have but the printer had no paper. C'est la vie. Instead, here is a picture of a cat I like. It's that sort of place.

Alors, until my partner graces us with her presence in July you've just got me to deal with I'm afraid. The idea behind the blog was for me to try to create a daily Partner Look for me and my baby, let's see how that works out. I have a uniform (black, navy, breton etc.) which I hope she will be willing to work around. Alas, I can't ask her yet. Well I can but it seems unlikely that I would get a response.

So, all you're going to get now is an overview of my experiences, maternity fashion related and otherwise, as a Franglaise living in Aix en Provence. 

THE PARTNER LOOK: LET'S GO